Wednesday, July 13, 2011

Dirty Old Man?

The staid old Republicans fell in lust with their sexy young constituency, Miss Right Wing. They couldn't resist when she cooed sweet promises of passion into their ears but, instead of confining themselves to the guilty delights of an election year romp in the hay, they freaking married her! They promised to love and honor her until death did them part. They promised to give her everything her little heart desired. And with their manhood in her hand, she's holding them to it.

She bewitched them Now, their sensibleness is starting to re-assert itself. "C'mon, Honey, be reasonable. We don't really want the country to default on its debt. That could be disastrous."

So, Speaker Boehner oh-s0-cautiously suggests that there might be some room for compromise with the Democrats. Maybe accept a few small tax hikes on the richest citizens in return for more cuts in spending. And, whoosh, the next thing he knows, he finds his bed made up on the sofa!

Then, Senator Mitch McConnell oh-so-cautiously posits that the best of both worlds for the Republicans might be to grant a constitutional privilege allowing the president to single-handedly raise the debt ceiling thus placing the consequences squarely on his head while exempting the R's from any responsibility. And, whoosh, the next thing McConnell knows, his pillow has been moved out to the doghouse!

In their heart of hearts, I believe most of the Republican old guard want what they believe is best for their country. Yes, they disagree with the Dems on many issues and yes, they certainly aren't above playing poison politics to win elections but when you get right down to the nitty-gritty, they know that compromise is the way the game is played lest you propel the nation into unchecked chaos. You drive the hardest bargain you can, then accept the results. The old bulls know you win some and you lose some but how you lose determines whether you live to fight another day.

This isn't the first time the old gentleman, in his dotage,  has been beguiled by a sweet young thing. A flash of breast, a shot of leg and he's off and running. The last love of his life convinced him that he'd win the battle of shutting down the government. The people, she told him, would turn against the young president. They didn't. She convinced him that impeachment was a winning issue. It wasn't.

Now this one, a let-the-chips-fall-where-they-may gal if there ever was one,  wants him to sabotage the country's credit rating and renege on its obligations to its citizens. And if he doesn't? She says she'll leave his ass (though it may be an empty threat because where would go to have it as good as with him?)

Meanwhile, the rest of us, who'll all be affected by what he does, wait with bated breath to see whether his brain or his balls will call the shot.